Twitter

thebootydiaries:

me before working out: i dont wanna do this

me while working out: I D O N T W A N N A D O T H I S

me after working out: WOW, i am simply phenomenal. every drop of blood running through my veins is graced with the ichor of the gods, i am an olympic athlete

(Source: alienanxrchy, via thebootydiaries)

superwholockpottervenger:

rneowies:

rneowies:

i love star trek!!!!

guys people think that i think this is actually star trek i dont want to be remembered like this

set phasers to fruit salad 

(Source: jellys, via kimkardasemen)

snout:

what are these “shower thoughts” everybody’s talking about, i dont think about anything in the shower, my mind is completely blank as i douse my body in scalding hot water and stare at a wall

(via momoyae)

gotitforcheap:

online millennial: did you see that clapback McDonald did on twitter today?

other online millennial: yes, it was cool

both online millennial, in unison: today we will eat at McDonald 

(via thebootydiaries)

fang11803:

gogu:

(via joshpeck)